Baby Steps

Livvy took her first steps last night - toward MooMoo. Of course, it thrilled my mom.

I didn't see them. I'm still waiting to see her walk.

...and then she was one.

"The moment a child is born, the mother is also born. She never existed before. The woman existed, but the mother, never. A mother is something absolutely new." -Rajneesh

Livvy, my darling. How can I even begin to tell you how wonderful you are to Daddy and me? How do I tell you that we can't wait to hear your voice in the morning? That we miss you when we're away from you for an hour? That your smile is what warms our hearts?

Dear Livvy - you are precious to us. We waited nine months to meet you, to see what you would be to us. Now, a year has passed since we first said "Hello" and it seems like you were born just yesterday. Our sweet angel.

Your year has been full of "firsts." We knew it would be. You're our first child, and you made your own path. You have grown quickly in thought and in ability, but you're still our tiny little girl. You love to crawl, to laugh, to bite. You still need your mommy and daddy - we hope you always will.

You've changed me. You've changed us. We went from newlyweds to a family of three. You made us grow, made us mature, made us think about more then ourselves.

Livvy, we pray for you everyday. We ask that God protects you, guides you, and that you will come to know Him. We pray that we raise you in a Godly manner and instill in you virtue and morality. We long to see the day when you come to know Christ as your Savior. We want to be good parents to you, Liv. We know we're going to mess up - but we're trying our hardest. We just want what's best for you.

I hope that when you grow up, you realize this. That you know how much your dad and I have loved you from the beginning. We will be here for you - laughing with you, hurting with you, and praying for you.

We love you, Sweet Baby. Happy first birthday.

Love,

Mommy

Milestones:

Walking - no

Pulling up - since 6 months

Crawling - since 5 months

Words - Mommy, Daddy, Poppy, Papa, bye, hi, baby, and signing "Please"

Teeth - eight, 4 on top and 4 on bottom

You chew on everything. You understand "No, ma'am." You point to where you want to go. You love to crawl up stairs and to take a bath. You chew on blankets when you get tired. You dance to music and you sing "laaaa" when Mommy and Daddy do. You know how to "Pretty Baby-Bonk" with Aunt D and you are great at giving High 5's.

The B Word

So, we're budgeting.

Budgeting money. Budgeting time. Budgeting.

And I feel like an utter failure. We're using Dave Ramsey's 7 Baby Steps and his budgeting tools (because I'm to lazy/incompetent to make a budget by myself. His stuff is easy!). So far, we've stayed within our budget, but it's really pointing out where I mess up.

I'm an impulse buyer. A big impulse buyer. You know, they say not to go to the store without a list (and while you're hungry). Wellllll, I went to the store yesterday right after lunch and with a pre-made list of how much of everything I needed for the week (with the prices beside it to know how much I'll spend)...and I spent $40 extra dollars.

I decided to add to Josh's birthday gifts, get Liv a smalllllll Valentine's Day/Birthday gift, grab some birthday cards to send out this month to family, pick up another tshirt for myself...

These "small things" blow our budget. I blow our budget.

Really, it comes down to self-control. I lack self-control. I eat when I'm not hungry. I buy when I don't need. I speak when I should be silent.

How do I fix this? Is there anything I can do to improve my self-control?